TWITTER/X — As America faces its first school shooting of the day, heroic gigachads over on Twitter were quick to point out that the shooter, a person we know literally nothing about, is a trans woman hellbent on the destruction of modern society as we know it.

Once again, liberals are silent as another tranny shoots up a school in some drive-by rural town. This is the America the DEMONcrats want.

@chudtoaster, X

Transvestigations were immediately underway as soon as news stations across the country began to report on the scene. Images of the shooter’s face filled the Internet as the kindhearted keyboard warriors immediately discovered that the shooter is a trans woman, as proven by one anonymous 4chan post.

Though some tried to argue that there was no way we could know that from a small scrap of information about one of the three hundred million people in America, the protagonists were quick to shut them up with harmless slurs.

It seems, though, that despite their valiant and selfless work, our heroes may have been wrong again. As we’ve learned literally three real-life pieces of information about the shooter from the family, it has been determined that he is not actually a trans woman, and vehemently opposes the queer community in one of his many manifestos.

I’ve reached out to some of our freedom fighters for comment on their unfortunate error, but two have blocked me and another told me to kill myself. No doubt the stress of finding out it was a white, cishet man has gotten to them. I’ll see if I can reach out to any of them tomorrow when we see another school shooter have their fifteen minutes (of being a woman).

(Update 9/12: I wrote this in January of 2025.)